Some stories in the Bible can lose the weight they have in modern culture. This is usually because we don't understand all of the elements at play during the time period that portion of scripture was written. So I thought I would have fun creating a modern day translation of Judges 6:25-32. This is based off of the NASB.
Now on the same night the Lord said to him, “Take your father’s bull and a second bull seven years old, and pull down the Television which belongs to your father, and cut off the internet modem and router that are beside it; and build an altar to the Lord your God on the top of the entertainment center in an orderly manner, and take a second bull and offer a burnt offering with the wires of the internet and cable which you cut” Then Gideon took ten men of his church members and did as the Lord had spoken to him; and because he was too afraid of his father’s household and the men of the city to do it by day, he did it by night. When the men of the city arose early in the morning, behold, the Television was torn down, and the Internet modem and router which were beside it were cut, the phones in the household were lined up with fully cracked screens, and the second bull was offered on the altar on the entertainment center which had been built. They said to one another, “Who did this thing?” And when they searched about and inquired, they said, “Gideon the son of Joash did this thing.” Then the men of the city said to Joash, “Bring out your son, that he may die, for he has taken away our sources of joy, and indeed, he has even canceled our streaming services!” But Joash said to all who stood against him, “Will you defend netflix? Will you defend the hours you spend on your phone when you leave your bible untouched? Or will you defend your use of technology to watch things that are not honoring to God? Whoever will plead for having this entertainment back shall be put to death by morning. If netflix is a god, let it defend itself, because someone has torn down it's host.” Therefore on that day he named him Entertainment-smasher, that is to say, “Let entertainment fight against him,” because he had torn down our source of joy, entertainment.
There are primarily two important notes that I would add.
1. This isn't a perfect illustration
It is important to note that we are dealing with sacrifices in the Old Testament. This is why the mock translation keeps the portions regarding the sacrifices. That wouldn't take place in 2020 because we have a perfect sacrifice for our sin and idolatry that we must repent from. That Sacrifice is Jesus Christ dying on the cross for our sins.
2. Sometimes we need extreme illustrations
For some of us, we might immediately suggest that this parallel is way too extreme. Is God really calling us to give up all entertainment? The reality is that there is a better question to ask. "If God called you to give up all entertainment would you do it? We might then say sure, but simultaneously get mad if it was forced upon us like someone within our own home or church coming in and cutting your internet cords and smashing your TVs. We need to actually be more introspective with questions like this instead of immediately dismissing them. We need to ask ourselves to what level do we seek more joy and peace in this instead of in Jesus? Sure this is an extreme illustration, but just because it is extreme doesn't negate the fact that Jesus actually said we must deny ourselves and follow Him.
Matthew 16:24-26 (ESV)
"Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul?"
